“If you don’t care that every time you use the word outside of its proper context you diminish both the severity of the act and the impact it has on the woman and those who love her then I doubt there is anything I can say to make you stop”I refuse to believe that a woman could seriously be offended by the use of the word rape in the incorrect surroundings. If they are, they’re seriously fucking stupid and perhaps they should kindly stop being so sensitive.regards.

Do me a favour love

“I won’t speak to the murder, I believe that comparison is too far-fetched, perhaps because the use of the word ‘murdered’ has become common place, or perhaps because it is used in other areas of life to describe something extreme and not just football.”

According to your logic we should use the term ‘rape’ more frequently and it more areas of life then.

i completely agree ladyarse.

i agree because of the context of the word it just doesnt make sense to me to hear or read that a team or player have just been “rape”. chris rock in one of his comedy shows said “its not the word thats used its the context its used in”. this was when talking about words like n***** or f****t or gay which i agree with. but rape can only mean one thing. it only has one meaning.

with the words murdered or battered to me they make more sense to describe a player being beaten. or a team being completely torn apart. beaten is like the word battered imo. havent heard pundits use  ”rape” but have heard them say “oh walcott has just beaten his left back there”.

also i think a lot of men will agree with you. any man that has a mum, sister, daughter, aunt, wife or female friend they care about. if they do how hard do men feel it is to support their family or friend?

This is why i don’t follow ladyarse. Even though i agree, the way she writes is so… Whats the word?

It’s worth mentioning that the word ‘rape’ does not necessarily refer to the sexual crime. 

The following sentences are perfectly acceptable:

‘Our rain forests are being raped.’
‘We returned to the village to find that it had been raped.’

Rape can refer to destruction, desecration or ransacking. I probably wouldn’t use the word myself but people’s ignorance of its other uses is possibly the reason they take offence. 

Dear Ladyarse,

I am delighted with this masterpiece that you have written. I’m a psychologist and work with many women who have experienced sexual abuse many of whom cannot use the word rape due to the overwhelming emotions it evokes. I am appalled that such a term can be used to describe anything but forcible sexual assualt. I am even more shocked by some of the responses you have had – sad indeed.

Keep up the good work.

Sunny

I think if you check your Oxford English dictionary you will find three distinct definitions of the term; sexual rape being one.

When Harry Redknap ‘raped’ Portsmouth, by carrying off players that Portsmouth no longer had the financial ‘strength’ to hold onto, he was guilty of another definition of the term.

Sexual rape is a harrowing and terribly traumatic crime for the ‘victim’, or is it always?

When a fifteen-yea-old enjoys sexual relations with a sixteen-year-old (gender independent) the eldest party is guilty of ‘statutory rape’, but that is hardly a life-altering crime, or it shouldn’t be.

I undestand your motivation in raising the subject for debate, but not your polarisation.

Enjoy your articles, and keep up the thought provocation.

What, sexism from football fans?…………. “Yeah, do me a favour, love (Richard Keys).”
I definitely agree with you, but sorry to be a pessimist, I don’t think there is anything you can do about this – profanity is part of human nature.
I would add that swearing is general, often non specific to the subject it refers - its only purpose is to evoke a sense of offence. This is why swearing often makes no literal sense - eg “f**king hell,” does not refer to some kind of satanic orgy, and when you say “f**k you,” you are not hoping the person will get laid – instead an existing curse or phrase (bloody hell or damn you) has been retrofitted with a term that is most offensive in contemporary society. (For example in religious societies the most offensive terms are often blasphemy, whereas in societies where religion has lost its potency, taboo is often bodily effluvia or sexual acts).
Finally, this brings me to my point, that when “rape” is used in the context you have described, the intension is not to be literal. No fan is implying that the referee has sexually forced himself upon one of the players; it could just as well be any other taboo term, it does not necessarily even refer to the act itself, rather the speaker has hijacked the sense of revulsion you naturally take to rape and used it to elicit a response.
 Just because it’s not literal doesn’t mean that this use of language can be condoned, and I could not agree more that this is not an acceptable term for anyone to use. It goes without saying that rape is an abhorrent act. But, taboo language is inherent to human nature, and, if there’s not a more appropriate time and a place for a discussion of the idiosyncrasies of language & human psychology than an Arsenal-blog, then i’ll go f**k myself.

Thank you everyone for all the positive and constructive feedback.

I simply despair at the rest of you.

LA, why? You’re normally so serene and light-hearted!

I would have thought the banality of these responses to be foreseeable..

Personally, I don’t think you can police language, and i don’t think you’d want to either. Surely none of those comments employing the word ‘rape’ were intended to trivialise serious criminal offences. And I don’t think they could anyway.

I honestly don’t see the point of all this reaction. Mountains and mole hills.

CCome on its not suppose.to be offensive even my bird uses the word during football wanna no what is sick a bird who u dnt no on public transport talking.bout.periods!!! It’s just a.term n many phrases out there that people use that people dnt like. No need to write a.blog bout it!

Good but very sensitive topic. Didnt knew british use this vocabular so often.

Every language is alive and developing all the time, words are morphing and accepted with different  use depend of socity, but its sad that people use more often this pool of words.
 In my country dont think anyone will dare to use in sport news, the word “murder” or “rape” like some examples here, it would be seen realy rude.
Maby Internet and social networks are to blame, distance reduce the responsobility of the words used on internet, and this slowly push the moral line and enter in daily communication.Its strange how some people try to win argument with showing multiple meaning of the word “rape” when we all know with what meaning that word was used when we talk about football. Giving shallow example to justify your side dont mean winning the argument.

this all makes me laugh, the word rape is unexceptable and offensive, the word murdering a team in football is quite fine i think, sometimes i hear that team got masiccard does not offend.  The reason being one is ofensive and others arn’t simply. It makes me laugh cause football fans are offensive, really really offensive sometimes. is this ok. well some people just like to offend people and that is that. all these arguements about something as simple as this is crazy people are arguing whether something that is offensive is offensive or not.. they sometimes shout racist chants. thats offensive it happens its not a debate it is just offensive. if people say i am going to rape you they are not trying to be nice but to offend, so there is no arguement, lets face it people can be gits not much you can do about it, especially in our culture, people love swearing and being offensive at the football, boundries will always be pushed. might have a gay player soon, sure the fans will be nice. just shows the crowd to be a crowd. its like socrates said thousands of years back people are stupid, he also said a person is clever go figue.

You know how it’s plain to see that you’re talking for talking sake. First of all you attempt to distinguish between rape on a gender basis and secondly you’re talking out of your arse, from a soapbox and on a matter you’ve clearly never experienced.

People that have been raped aren’t people running around screeching at the mere mention of the word, they’re people who are offended by the act. The atrocity of the act is summarised by the word, it’s not defined by the word.

Two out of three definitions in the dictionary don’t reference sex in the slightest:
2. To seize and carry off by force.
3. To plunder or pillage.Are you attempting to say that this word shouldn’t be used accept for in reference to victims? Who do you empower by such an opinion, certainly not the victims… that’s right, only yourself who is attempting to sound intelligent and compassionate in the worst possible manner. It was a sad sad day in your world when you actually thought you were offering anything to the world with this post. Pat yourself on the back for your ineptitude at life.

Forgive me for coming to this debate late and also for possibly going over old ground. I haven’t the time to read the 160 odd posts on the subject.

Firstly, I absolutely agree that the word ‘rape’ should not be used in anything other than the context it was intended for.  To use the word in relation to what is after all, just a game, is ridiculous.

Second, for anyone to try and convince people that the word means, to probably 99.999% of people, anything other than a non-consensual sexual act is not just ludicrous, but just strikes me as someone trying to show how clever they are. All it shows is the opposite.

Thirdly, for anyone to argue that, say, a full-back being taken to the cleaners by his opposing winger is non-consensual, is wrong.

By putting on a football kit and taking the field, the full-back is consenting to the possibility of humiliation at the hands of his opposing winger. Unless, of course, you are stupid enough to argue that a woman wearing a short skirt and going to a bar is herself ‘asking for it’ and is the author of her own misfortune.

A full-back puts himself in a position whereby he is trying to stop the opposition winger from performing the function he is put on the field for and in turn to try and turn the tables on him. But does a rape victim say ‘Come on, see if you can rip my underwear off and f*ck me, but if you can’t I’ll try to do the same to you?’ No, of course not.

So why try and defend the use of the word ‘rape’ and what it signifies to the overwhelming majority, by football pundits when there are are whole host of other innocent word that could be used. I know a lot of football pundits, managers etc are not the brightest, but don’t defend them. Educate them.

Why are people even bothering to create an argument FOR using the term?!!! There isn’t one, if you use it to describe anything other than it is…you’re a cunt. End of.

This unbalanced article unfortunately sums up the state of the modern world. A certain faction overreacting and fixating on terms of language that are evolving all the time. English is one of very few languages that are very descriptive. One of the oldest and widest used languages globally. You only need to look at Shakespeare’s works to see that we have always had colourful insults and terms for all types of references. Trying to now police this is ludicrous and somewhat laughable. There are stranger and cruder metaphors riddled throughout our language.

People have been victims of this crime for centuries and these references have been around for a similar amount of time. We are a country that prides itself on freedom of speech. If we stop using certain words…what next? As someone else mentioned what about “bugger me”. Or Frape as this portrays the same image surely. Everyone knows it and a lot of people, women included use it as a term. It doesn’t ridicule the act it pokes fun at the English language, a simple play on words. Is Frape just as offensive? I noted LA didn’t comment on this reference, conveniently. lol.
What about all of those people commenting on this word as disgusting. What about British comedy. A lot of British stand up comedians use a lot of profanity. They also make jokes about paedophilia eg. Gary Glitter, murder, death, aids, racism, wars, Bin Laden, etc. Have you never laughed at any joke around any of that content. If you say no then you are lying to yourself. We all have. Do you not think that some may find those anecdotes offensive? This broad type of comedy and outlook is what makes us British. That is what our comedy is, not being inhibited or afraid to shock. We can also take the p*ss out of ourselves as a nation, as British citizens, whether we are white, black or blue. The reason being it all stems from defiance, it is inbred in us to not conform and want to rebel at what is not deemed to be the norm or expected.The British Isles has been through centuries of change and from William the Conqueror to fighting two World Wars to the 7/7 bombings. British people have experienced a lot of hardship and the only way to battle that is with humour! to coin the phrase if you don’t laugh…you cry! It may not be to everyones taste but it is a phrase that has been around for years and we don’t just pick and choose which to cull based on a minorities blinkered viewpoint.
With that being said any comment on the actual act of rape as trivial as opposed to the macabre, “mental torture” how one individual referred to it, are ignorant. Plain and simple. Rape is a physical act of violence and all about control or a false impression of entitlement and refusal to take no for an answer. The intention to humiliate and degrade an individual to force them to feel powerless. Statistics suggest not only is it the most difficult crime to prove, often relying on bulletproof DNA and combination of victim and witness testimony. It is unfortunately the victim itself of many misconceptions and therefore misunderstood. The majority of acts are carried out by someone familiar to the victim and although sex does feature, it often as explained above isn’t the motive or the gratifying aspect to the perpetrator. Also it has the connotations associated with it as being misleading. Due mainly above to inconclusive DNA results or witnesses retracting statements. Or indeed in some cases, false accusations. Which, coincidentally have occurred within the football arena… RVP, Dickov, etc to name a couple. I’m not going to comment on any individual case. All I will say is all charges were dropped. The media also blows a lot of high profile stories out of proportion sometimes and other times just misreports information to create a stir and sell newspapers. Unfortunately, that is a fact. All of these reasons contribute to why public perception of rape is that it isn’t deemed as serious as other violent crimes.
All this article does is create a drama out of nothing. The act is heinous. The word is not! I feel sorry for those people who deem otherwise, because where do you draw the line. We either are a country of freedom of speech or we are not! I also feel offended as a man that this woman actually only mentioned men as an amended footnote at the end of the article. Poor and I think as ignorant as some of the so called men who LA feels would not understand due to their sex…talk about offensive! What a hypocrite. Lol …… “I don’t expect everyone to agree, and while it will come across as incredibly sexist of me to say it, I expect those who disagree to be men”
All I can say is on a most serious note. There must still be some raw feelings for you with regards to a particular incident in which you were directly affected. However, to just tag on the end a small paragraph to state that you realise that men are also victims but you know nothing about that side is just feeble. Makes me think this is more about forcing your extreme view on people rather than raising an issue you feel merits importance. I think you will find in all of my points I have not once referred to male or female. Rape unlike you does not discriminate against sex!
I will finish by saying I am a male and I am close to someone that was a victim of a violent sexual assault. She was extremely courageous and fought off her attacker. The police after her help with his identification, arrested him. Evidence was later found linking him to a series of attacks and she was asked to stand up and give testimony in court. Which, although she had been traumatised by the ordeal she did as she realised he needed to be prevented from repeating these gruesome crimes. He was convicted and sent to prison. It was a gruelling time and incredibly emotional for her and even for me. So she definitely has an understanding of this crime, empathy for any victims as do I and a right as much as any to comment on this issue.
So when I asked her if she thought I was misjudging this situation or misreading it in any way. Her answer was as follows:
:”No the word rape, used in the aforementioned context doesn’t ridicule victims of the act it serves simply as another descriptive word in the English language. She joked, there are many others that I would prefer to eliminate given the choice.”
I then finally asked if she found it offensive used in the metaphorical context referenced and she remarked:
“As an Editor I find it increasingly frustrating and incredibly insane that people are now trying to govern what words we are permitted to use and what we are not permitted to use, due to extreme political correctness. All it does is make my job more difficult.
That is one of the reasons why I love her because she just sees things for what they are.There are far more essential, pressing concerns in the world than the English language. It is a word and that is all it is.
So I will leave you with that food for thought Lady A and others.